to avoid making this a big sad bother like other vent threads, I’m gonna be trying to have it deleted or closed or whatever shortly after I see all I need to see.
might be a bit of a wrong place, but I don’t have a right place, so next best thing.
AITA for wanting HRT before I can pay for it myself?
the way I see it, getting HRT for someone with gender dysphoria is like getting a more pleasant life circumstance for someone with depression; if available, it’s just plainly good for their mental health.
the reason I can’t have it isn’t cause my parents think it’s a bad idea, but because I can’t pay for it. you know how the job market is, i live in an overpopulated town, money doesn’t grow on trees.
just, to me it feels like that doesn’t matter. For one it’s a time-sensitive thing because that’s how hormones work, for two, I feel like the best way to teach your child to buy stuff with their own money shouldn’t be on important medical treatment.
for context i’m not trans, just different.
for other context, my family’s not exactly troubled in terms of money. it is hard to do well financially in the US in 2026 but things aren’t that bad.
i don’t want to chalk it up to my parents not understanding, since it could well be that i’m the one who doesn’t understand.
also, somewhat related, is it wrong that I’ve stopped asking for help when I consistently don’t get it when I ask?
no but neither are your parents if they’re the ones paying for it, as you mentioned the economy is pretty bad and HRT isnt like a life or death operation
hard to say, generally its bad to stop asking for help consistently but sometimes you have to decide on how important it is before asking
Still though
These days, money is tight, even in the best of times
I don’t know you nor your family, though just from the statistics I can say it’s pretty unlikely they’re doing this out of either foolishness or malice
It’s probably just a matter of the difficulty in financing a treatment that they might or might not see as non-essential
It may be worth considering that nothing is really free
Someone’s gotta pay for that, in this case the taxpayer, and right now We the People are broke
Worth it? Yes. Possible? Probably not in the near future.
I wouldn’t say it’s the current administration’s fault more than it is the fault of all of the administrations in recent history. The economy is bad because of a string of poor financial decisions at the top that continue to this day
Usually I think insurance can pay for some of it? I’m on HRT myself as a transmasc in the US and my parents take care of it for me, I don’t have a job as I do unpaid volunteer work and have a total of $2 in my bank account lol
It only took a month or 2 for me to get, I just had to talk to my psychiatrist and doctor and it’s just a bunch of paperwork(like literally everything)
Also, just wanted to note that getting HRT can be lifesaving. I’m glad that for you(?)it’s a more pleasant life circumstance, but for some people it can be life or death because of how distressing dysphoria can really be.
Either way NTA at all, if you’ve done the research on HRT and are willing to stab yourself every week(if you do injections like I do)for it then your parents should understand that it’s not just like a toy you want but literally a medical treatment…
also I’m curious what you mean by this, if you’re willing to clarify. No need to if it’s personal though
See, that’s what I’ve heard too, but I think I forgot to mention that my parents aren’t even willing to consider it or look for options until they know I can pay for whatever they’re imagining.
didn’t want to be too wordy. basically i’m a femboy but i don’t like the word femboy because most of its association goes to sexy stuff instead of actual identification.
so i’m a cis guy who is sad being manly and happy being girly.
no one is really in the wrong - it’s a bit iffy that your parents are telling you it’s a bad idea as their justification, as if it’s what you want it’s what you want, but also if they’d be paying, it’s kinda up to them at that stage