Dog owners: So this is lucy! She’s an adorable little ball of fur, she runs around with me outside every day! She’s so clever, and knows exactly when I’m sad, running over to me to cheer me up!
Cat owners: This is steward. He is a brainless moron. Sometimes he disappears for a week. He has zero attachment to me. I sometimes think he knocks stuff over just to annoy me. Absolute idiot.