Dolphins: the high-horse pricks of the ocean.
“oh look at me. I’m a dolphin. I’m so nice and kind to everyone.”
I’ve never liked dolphins. They’ve always come across like they’re planning some mysterious, underground and suspicious shit.
You can easily imagine them turning around whilst they’re helping a puppy or a baby polar bear and smiling back at you with a villainous grin; as if they’re helping and being so naturally kind as to convince the human race that they are wonderful creatures.
But I tell you what dolphins, I’m not buying it.
I am willing to bet that dolphins actually run an underground syndicate.
Drug smuggling, seal trafficking, stealthily assassinating fishermen and cleverly blaming it on sharks.
I’m sure these devious devil animals have done it all.
And I Know What Some of You Are Saying..
“oh no you hater, u just not like dolphins because they are majestic and beautiful creatures”
- being jealous of dolphins is completely ludicrous
- it’s just proof that these underwater brain head water mutants have already hypnotized your minds
Do You Even Know..
…where the term “dolphin” even comes from?
I didn’t think so.
It actually originated from the Latin term of Murderer Crime Killers of the Ocean.
“dolphins are actually kind creatures with sweet hearts”.
Okay, look; just go check on them for five minutes the come back and tell me that they’re not the murderous killers of the ocean and I’ll drop it.