(Free Verse Poem/Vent) Shadowed Window

Off Topic
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…
Oh, a passerby coming to read some internet moron’s post on a dead forum? Honestly, I appreciate it.
Now… Do you hear that? Of course you don’t. But I do. That pounding, the pounding of wrath. My heart. It beats like a drum, full of anger and spite. Not towards some friends, not to some people rude to me, but to those who have wronged the ones I love.
That wrath, it comes from a lifetime of listening to cherished friends, as they suffer their entire lives, always being wronged, without a worthwhile right at all.
It comes from being unable to stop it as well. They suffer, and I am unable to stop it. No matter how much my heart screams, or my rage bellows within, I still must remind myself I cannot do a damned thing to strike the source of their problems.
No sword will suffice, no firearm either. Not even a lantern. The problem isn’t the tool…
It’s personal limits. I cannot go and help them. I just stand at this window with a shadow cast upon it by an unknown source, and have to watch. I guess this is akin to what Dante saw in his journey through Hell. Having to witness how people suffer, except here, these people have commit no crime worthy of this punishment. No sin worthy of it. Not a damn thing that would deem this fitting.
Each time I stand here, I feel my anger grow. My heart feeling as if it’s skipping more beats when I get wrathful. The draining hope, that just becomes built back up by not seeing it for a couple of days.
It’s things like this… These things, they make me sometimes wonder if Dave Gahan was right. I do wonder if he didn’t say a singular blasphemous rumor when he said “I think that God’s got a sick sense of humor.”.
The kind of maniac of a deity to give these people the suffering, and forcing those who would act to end it to watch, and be unable to do more. The kind of sick humor in also making your words less effective with each passing day. All while being unable to express how you feel to others, as they seem to ignore it, or not understand.

That is why I came here to say this. My soul has been decaying under this despair, wrath, and unending cycle. I haven’t been able to let this out in a good way, until just today. A poem. Even if nobody reads it, I already feel a slight ease on my being, having approached the final end mark.

Well, be off, now. You have more important things to do than listen to a madman, don’t you?

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I appreciate the thought, Level. However, I’ve tried to get those people help through that, and they just haven’t. I know one said she couldn’t, which sucks… The other I don’t know about.

As for myself… Yeah, calling a hotline isn’t exactly a possibility for me, since parents would be kinda suspicious about it. And even then, I’m probably not that terrible, right?

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y
image

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thank you random stranger for the poem

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mm

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Are you actually mentally ok?
Like this isn’t a joke are you okay

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image

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I’ll be fine.
This kind of thing just comes and goes, but it does seem to get worse every time it comes up. I wanna stop it, but at the same time, I gotta remember I can’t stop what my friends deal with.

I will say, writing this and letting out the pent-up frustration over it from the last few months was a great help.

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Jubilee posts wholesome image for the first time (Not clickbait!)

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yo Retribution

if you’re angry at something a good way to vent that anger is by punching children a punching bag

easily accessible and a good way of venting stress

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I may have to give up my “#1 Edgelord” badge… :frcryin:

Hope you get better tho Ret :nod:

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k

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I keep forgetting to set that thing up. But then again it also demands sand or water and that’s just no

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Sheesh, am I that awful? Christ, I need to find a better way to let this out, and avoid getting so upset over it.

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Nah I was exaggerating. Getting edgier than me means instant death.

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