Help i got in a love triangel with captain trigno and captain sage (story) (i wrote this out of spite)

[BNTarwarn]

check this entire reply for context

BNT's Hell Thread ft. doodles and terrible posts

i should explain where did i get this idea first i speedrun through a (how to not fucking write) romance story yesterday and boy, shit was painfully bad the reason i managed to finish it to the ending was “how would this mess of a romance end wtf” so yeah i want to write something painfully bad to spite myself and probably everyone yeah so i want y’all to help me decide the prompt/setting for the incoming shitpost story the story’s quality will be somewhere like this one and here’s the in…

people fucking voted for the classic love triangle between trigno/sage/the player and names got japanese suffixes, some lines/words might be straight up japanese

also i’ll just refer to the player like their literal name was Player because yes

i wrote this in one go while being pissed about something and it’s supposed to be a shitpost, a lot of stuff are going to be incoherent

---

[ location: Borealis i guess lmao ]

Player: mmm yes what a subarashii day in this very fine tavern
chugs down vodka

Trigno: hey

Player: T-T-T-T-T-T-T-TRIGNO-SAN?!?!?!?!
chokes on vodka and fucking collapses
lies down on the floor

Trigno: what is wrong with you

Player: everything

Trigno: yeah fair enough
chugs down his own drink calmly

Player: Tringo-san what are you doing here

Trigno: im looking for pizza sauce

Player: why are you looking for pizza sauce in a tavern

Trigno: it’s for the recipe i swear

Player: wow
looks at trigno with anime sparkly effect
romantic bgm plays

Trigno: what

Sage: kicks down the window and jumps in
fuck

Player: oh my god sage-sama
anime blush

Sage: the fuck you lookin at

Player: yabai i have to choose between anatatachi
dramatic anime tears rolling down on face

Sage: the fuck is this idiot on

Trigno: no ide-

Player: this is honto ni yabai!!!
atashi ga daisuki you both!!!

Trigno: what the fuck have we done

Sage: uh
yeah im dipping rn bye

Trigno: yeah me too
niles vanish

Player: fuck

[RayhanahyaR]

…
there is no comment here
rayhan died

[jubileesucks]

what sort of chinese propaganda did you get re-educated to before writing this

[StarForDays]

“Wow, I’m actually quite interested. Let’s see what BNT put down today.”

@BNTarwarn

Player: T-T-T-T-T-T-T-TRIGNO-SAN?!?!?!?!
chokes on vodka and fucking collapses
lies down on the floor

“I think I’m done here.”

[jubileesucks]

@StarForDays

Wow, I’m actually quite interested. Let’s see what BNT put down today.

first mistake when logging onto the forums

[Broly]

@jubileesucks

first mistake when logging onto the forums

[Rake]

Amazing, this has inspired me to write again (haha jk I have no time :()