Morden Is A Cat: Chapter 1

Author note: I’m not sorry
Do I ship them all in a poly? Absolutely.

Maybe it was a bad idea to let [REDACTED] mix up their potions again.

I stretch out my body out like I usually do, rolling over onto my side with an interrupted snore. I take my arm out, eyes still blurry from sleep, just to try and get the candles on. I nearly slip off my bed trying, not realizing how…small I had become.

I finally wipe the blurriness from my eyes only to realize that black fur covers my body.
Wait a goddamn second…why the hell are my hands so stubby?
I’m ready to freak the fuck out!

I have to wipe my eyes again, this time nearly poking it out. I stare again- oh…shit. I don’t know what the fuck is happening! Is this still a dream or-

The door slams open.

Oh shit.

[REDACTED] walks into the room, a decorated glass bottle in hand. They look at me and immediately start chuckling. This is humiliating.

“Oh! Oh…oh! Aha- oops.”
They continue laughing with a poorly hidden snort.
“That’s my fault.”

I try speaking, but all that comes out is an annoyed hiss. [REDACTED] takes the bottle in their hand and lets me go near it. A thousand smells in the room come to me, I can hear everything around this place! I attempt to stand up on my feet, immediately toppling over and being forced to go on all fours.

That’s more than disappointing.

I sniffed at the bottle [REDACTED] handed to me, I might as well get used to the whole “smell more than I see” thing. I shake my head with a hiss. So THAT’S why I’m like this? There’s a stench of cat in that bottle.

“Okay. I may or may not have mixed up the potions again.”
“And, I don’t know how to reverse it yet.”
“You’re going to have to be like this for a day or so…sorry.”

I yell at them and yowl all over until they pat my head down. They apologize again, but I’m still not amused. Did this dipshit just turn me into a cat for the shits n’ giggles? Though, that scratch behind the ear felt pretty nice…I hear myself purr slightly-wait, no!

I follow [REDACTED] out of the room and into the inn. Everything looks so much larger! That’s actually a bit scary. I continue to follow [REDACTED] until we see a red haired girl causing a ruckus at the bartender’s table. This inn couldn’t get any more loud already.

“Ma’am, this isn’t a galleo-”
“This is a weird green looking thing!”

It’s Iris.

Iris sweeps her drink off the table and I can feel her magic nearly explode from her body. She’s like a ticking time bomb if you also strapped a flaming cannonball onto it, and then chucked it into a volcano made out of Hades’ tears or something. Either way, I find her hot temper amusing.

I stretch out my paws again, scratching them against the floor. I’m able to get away with more things in a form like this. It’s hard walking on all four of my…feet? Whatever it is. I rub my cheek with one of my paws. It’s pretty warm in here with Iris ready to kill someone. For the 50th time.

I spot Neviro napping on a table by himself. Maybe I can do something about that? He looks so pathetic when he’s asleep. I’d be annoyed if it weren’t for his face looking like that. My ears perk up to the sound of [REDACTED] speaking to me again. I’m not used to it, but them talking more makes my heart warm up a little every time.
“Don’t cause trouble. That’d be bad.”

Now, I would say “I won’t.” But right now? It’s “no promises.” I let out a small mewl. It’s awkward having this as my vocalization, but it’s better than nothing. I make my way to Neviro’s side on the table. I paw at his face until he wakes up. Wait…he doesn’t know it’s me. Maybe I can mess with him?

Neviro immediately picks me up. This is worse than the time Iris did back in Ravenna. I squirm a little, but his grip is firm, and I can’t get out.
“Aww. You’re cute.”
I have never been more ashamed.

I’m carried away by Neviro. He makes a passing statement about “going to hang out with a cat he found” to [REDACTED] and the fired up Iris. This was a terrible idea. I was supposed to mess with him! Not the other way around!


Despite my first impressions, Neviro is actually quite charming. He attempted to play with me more than a few times, but I’m not actually a cat. The pats people give me when passing by do feel nice though. Some do it too rough, and I have to fix my fur, but it’s alright.

I spent a surprising amount of time with Neviro, and soon Iris when she stopped being a fireball. They both mentioned how adorable I was. If only they said that to me when I was human, too. It might make me feel better about myself every now and then. [REDACTED] was “dealing with Morden” allegedly. Aha, no.

Iris continues to chatter about “how much Morden sleeps”. I get it, I’m lazy.
“He’s still sleeping!”
“Well, there’s only so many reasons he’d still be sitting around in his room.”
“He could be sulking, like that one time [REDACTED] got stuck in the mines.”
“Oh, right. He was really bummed out for a time.”

Ugh! How dare they talk about [REDACTED] like they’re…they’re…whatever- I know they don’t mean it, but it’s not like that! I want to jump up onto Iris’ face and smack her forehead and nose with my claws, but that’d just get me into trouble. I promised [REDACTED] not to, and I’m going to at least try to keep that promise.

“What a pretty black kitty…can I get a kiss? Hehe!”
Iris leans towards my body for a cuddle and I back off. Oh hell no! I am NOT getting that close to her! Or anyone for that matter. I’m not an actual cat, damnit!

She shrugs.
“Maybe he’s just mad.”

Neviro is right. I’m very…very stressed. If only for one reason. I hadn’t seen them since the morning, and they said they had to go places for a cure.

I hope [REDACTED] is okay.

They’re my only real friend left.


I’m getting worried.

I haven’t seen [REDACTED] return in a day and a half. What if they’re hurt again? Iris and Neviro don’t seem to be concerned, but fuck them I am! I’ve seen them go on their own for weeks, but something is itching at me that something’s wrong.

I step off the counter where I was taking a nap. I need to go and find them. Where would they even go for a cure? A cure for being a cat? They could’ve gone across the whole sea while I was stuck here!

Maybe I can find them. But as a cat? Who’s going to let me go anywhere? Iris and Neviro are going to realize I’m gone, and maybe even connect the dots!

I have to find them.

I run across the paved stone roads. The pads on my feet are getting sore from the hard ground. I have to keep going, even if they start to crack and bleed. This town is way larger when you’re a cat, damn! People notice the “black cat” zooming across the town, but I don’t stop.

I chase that familiar scent. I know that scent! Maybe it really was a good idea for me to be a cat. I track my way to the docks where the trail ends. Wait, no! It doesn’t end! It keeps going across the water. How am I supposed to sail when I’m this size though?

I see a ship about to depart from the port.

It’s my only chance.

I leap on as it’s sails unfurl, and I claw myself onto the deck, but I can’t get up. It’s too slippery with the water, and I nearly fall into the sea.


Maybe I’ll just wake up.
Maybe it’ll be them.
I know I can’t tell them.
But I want to.

There’s nothing more that I wish to do
You make me purr when I’m feeling blue
Be it rain or a sunny day
Your lap is my favorite place to stay
You know what I need

I knead you

I knead you

And I know that you can’t hear me say
The words that tell you I am here to stay
But I hope that you see that I need you.


art from the lovely sophia


I just made an account 4 dis lol



1 Like

god damn this is kinda cute

I wonder if morden gets to use his curse while as a cat

imagine THE DEATH CAT coming along to make the wolf in puss in boots quiver in fear

also interesting how morden doesn’t consider iris or neviro real friends

meh!! its because morden knows the player better

1 Like

i love you too banana

i cant believe morden is a focking cat now

Morden when the potion tastes funny