[SS]Conqueror's Ambition

The seas were calm under the rising sun, giving false testimony to the current tension running through the air. Against the sun were two caravels flanking a brig, the signature blue and silver dubbing each ship as one from the Grand Navy.

Each crew member aboard their respective vessels had gone silent, waiting in nervous anticipation for their commanders orders. Their fear, despite their training, was still palpable, yet they stood ready for action should the command come.

The commander aboard his brig sat in silence, contemplating the scene before him. Across the way stood what can only be described as the Devil’s own armada. A massive collection of Ketchs, Gunboats, Frigates, and more, all together blackening the very water they floated on. Spearheading the fleet was a monsterous Ship of the Line, a night black and crimson beast armed to the teeth with the word Remembrance painted along her side.

The commander couldn’t help the sigh that escaped him. He knew that ship well for he was tasked with bringing in the head of her captain, the very Bastard of the Seas himself. Even in such a dire situation he knew he was still expected to do his duty and even willingly offer his life to fulfill his mission. His subordinates had the same obligations. It was why his next words were such a shock.

“Let them pass.”

“Captain?!”

His second in command, having stood next to him awaiting orders, was bewildered, unable to hide the shock from her voice.

“The Grand Navy has been hunting the Bastard for several years now. If we just let him pass the repercussions we’ll face…”

His subordinates would be demoted from their positions. He himself would be exiled if lucky, executed if not.
But surely the death of one man on trial is better then the slaughter of three ships worth of navy officers.

“Why should we seek to throw away our lives fruitlessly, especially when those pirates thrist after futilty themselves. Let them pass and I assure you, the world will thank us even if the Navy does not. Or do you believe they’ll survive in those cursed seas?”

His second in command straightened under his gaze, shaking her head steadily.
When met with the pathetic blockade, the pirates sent a messenger, stating their intentions of traveling to the very ends of the Dark Seas and bringing back what they believe to be treasure even older than the gods. In an early celebration of this lunacy, the Bastard had allowed them to pass without harm. To be at the mercy of a pirate was disgraceful, yet if said pirate eargerly sought his own demise…

“Give the orders. Clear the way yet do not leave yet.”

His second in command snapped a salute. “Yes sir.”

Turning on her heel she marched out of the cabin and relayed to the crews what was to be done.


The fleet had finally passed, making its way to the horizon. The commander stood watch, witnessing the armada’s departure. Drake Cross, Warlord and Conqueror of three nations, the very Bastard of the Seas himself, had finally reached the Dark Seas.

Notes:
Thanks for reading, please give feedback.

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word corrections

aboard

commanders

palpable

couldn’t

straightened

pathetic

messenger

grammar

Seas should be capitalized as it’s part of the proper name

get rid of “have”

His second in command, having stood next to him awaiting orders, was bewildered

other/subjective

feels like an awkward in-between of proper sentences and run-on. i would recommend making these independent sentences and adjusting them to flow as such, or removing the details like “their intentions” and “what they believed . . . older than the gods,” and making it a simple 1, 2, and 3 list

my main gripe with anything is flow. reading it in your head or as you would aloud helps to make things understandable without being too monotonous or uniform. but ofc this is the subjective category bc that’s dependent on the person

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