This is not your usual forums post, so that may explain the reactions of some of the people here. I am going to treat it as a serious rant because it talks about pretty serious stuff
Don’t feel guilty for not being able to do stuff you used to enjoy. Instead, focus on your uni studies and look at it as something you do for self improvement. Although that sounds odd, if you see it as something you want to do, it will be easier to convince yourself to focus on what’s important.
As for your rant about nine, you chose to place trust on the wrong person. It already happened so there is nothing to do than to try and learn from it. Think about it sometimes, and maybe you could start seeing the situation from different perspectives. It’s something to think about, and it’s better to have something to think about than to have silence sometimes.
Maybe the forums isn’t the best place to share this, because a lot of forumers are not very used to topics like this being discussed and that kind of explains the reactions, but sometimes it builds up and you can’t help it. In that case, the best option would be to just log off and take a walk outside. Do something to calm yourself down. Just take care of yourself.
To lighten the mood I want to end my post by saying
Noobs in combat is a good game