so a few days ago something happened and I don’t think I have ever felt so uncomfortable and scared in my life.
I was playing loomian legacy like usual when suddenly my mom came into my room and told me two girls I apparently talked to in the past a long time ago (but I don’t remember them at all) came and wanted to take me on a golf cart ride around the neighborhood.
this is when “it” kicked in.
I could already begin to feel a sudden shift from my normal silly sandal into something dreading to be put out of my misery. like some kind of dog that’s 4 weeks late for it’s own euthanizing. I tried to convince my mom I didn’t want to go but I was failed in my attempts and was forced into going with them.
I have never been more uncomfortable and embarrassed in my life, I felt as if I was being constantly judged 24/7, every move I make being watched, as the cart ride was moving all I could remember was the other kids from the neighborhood screaming and laughing, I didn’t say a word, they kept asking me things but I tried my best not to respond because I didn’t want to look vulnerable.
I decided I wanted to go home early so I got off the cart and started running as fast as I could to my house. I lied and said I had a good time to my mom.
All I can really advise that you do is be honest and say that your just not interested if there’s a next time.
Ain’t nothing wrong with not wanting to hang out with people that you hardly know.
Hell there ain’t even anything wrong with not wanting to hang out with people that you do know, if ya don’t feel up to it forcing yourself to hang out only results in a bad time for both parties.
→ Someone who has barely spoken with anyone outside of their immediate family group for the last 3 or so years.
Admittedly I’m not the greatest source of social advise.
