[ Oneshot ] ⚔️ My Last Symphony ⚔️

A quick/rushed story I made for the fun of it I guess, honestly it was fun writing it in my opinion, but I guess it what it is.


In the middle of the battlefield, somewhere south of the Bronze Sea, a wrecked grand navy fleet was seen in the horizon, near an empty wasteland. In that wasteland, a bright pillar of aether was conjured that was seen by the sailors that was far from the wasteland. Curiosity rose as they sailed there, wondering what could possibly be happening there.

An explosion occurred as the sailors got closer to the wasteland, it was a bright light, they were blinded by it as they couldn’t resist the brightness of the explosion. More curiosity rose from all the sailors, wanting to know what’s behind the explosion. They started to notice the hundreds of fallen Grand Navy ships, afraid but still determined.

As they got closer to the shore, they saw a heavily wounded Grand Navy lieutenant, breathing helplessly as he noticed the sailor. He couldn’t scream due to the damage he had suffered from that explosion or something else. They quickly rushed to the wounded lieutenant, asking what happened to him.

He couldn’t properly form a sentence but all he can mutters was “V-Vice…V…V-Vice Ad- Admiral… S-Salvator…” Before losing his consciousness. The sailors looked at each other, wondering who is this Salvatore guy before peeking the battlefield, they saw a young man who was around his mid late 30s, his navy blue and black gauntlet flickering to yellow as it flashed.

They saw the man struggling but couldn’t intervene as they’re only mere sailors, not some sort of backup. They couldn’t get a clear glance of the enemy he’s fighting but it seems that they’re a Spartan, but what Kingdom were they from is what they don’t know.

The young man huffed, struggling to breath normally, he’s all wounded on everything but his spirit still wanted to fight. Looking at the situation, he’s in no condition of winning, his body flashing as it rushed towards the masked opponent, using the velocity of his magic to enhance his strike.

The absurd amount of usage of his aether magic sure did alot on his body, exhausted but he stjll landed the strike right at them, in the head as a small crack was heard. The opponent quickly swung it’s longsword diagonally, Salvator quickly evaded that attack.

Running out of time, he raised his left arm, gathering some left over energy for one final blow. He doesn’t even know if this attack could let him escape without being severely wounded and exhausted. He coughed before glaring at the masked man. It looked at the struggling vice admiral, emotionless as he started marching toward him.

You’ve… done enough…” Said by the masked man, his voice sounded metallic due to the mask he’s wearing. He wanted to end this fight as soon as possible because he knew this would attract alot of unwanted attention in which he doesn’t want.

He then threw his sword right at the man chest, right before he could notice it, he fell onto the ground. Hjs attack that he’s been charging up was now rendered useless as he was lying down on the ground. At the brink of death, he softly smiled knowing his fate.

His Aether magic circle started to flicker and crack as it indicated how long he has until he’s fully dead, the man walked up and put its feet onto Salvator’s thighs, looking down at him as he held it’s sword handle. “What do you achieve by this… Young man…” Asked the masked figure.

He coughed blood, slowly lifting his head to look at the masked man, “J…Justice…” He slowly said, his voice cracking as he let out a chuckle. “I guess… This is it for me… My last symphony…” He smiled as his magic circle started fading away.

The masked man pulled his sword, nodding as he then closed the man eye, respecting his strength before walking away. “You served your people well… This is farewell… Brave soldier…” It said, walking away from the battlefield.



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Woah the JTN has released the writing.

Everything is described in a very dry way, kinda like a documentary.

Nice cool models

youll probably hear this a thousand times but show dont tell

One example of what you could write instead of just directly telling

His vision doubled, ears ringing, it felt like a down hill battle to even stand up. Every part of his body yelled for him to stop and give up, but he couldn’t surrender, not now. So he raised his arm, circle flickering in and out, as he prepared to release what might be his last spell

your writing is still a lot better then my original stuff, but there’s still a lot to improve

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