Have Iris turn into a dragon by eating a rock as a massive sacrifice built up to over several chapters. Then, completely revert it at the game’s conclusion.
I am still so freaking pissed that THIS was the storyline we got in TotK.
Lasting consequences? In MY nintendo game?
It didn’t even have to be a lasting consequence—just have there be an actual effort in reversing the process on the part of the player. Like, imagine if there was a post-game where-
Wait, right. Nintendo doesn’t do post-games for some bloody reason.
the reason botw and totk dont have post games is because basically every enemy and source of loot is a result of ganon, itd be real boring if you basically just ran out of loot
The monsters have been a part of Hyrule for longer than the kingdom’s existed—according to the TotK flashbacks. Fairly certain they’d stick around.
yeah, but they are explicitly being hostile and attacking you because of Ganon, as well as the blood moon being the thing that respawns them
either way no more derailing
Make England real
No, no I will keep derailing. Because I am legitimately peeved by how much of a blatant insult to art this game is. And to the craft of storytelling. Everything this game does for the sake of story manages to fall short of BotW, itself criticized for its rather minimal story. But at LEAST BotW’s minimal story was decently well-told and unique. Tears’s? Nah, they just SLAPPED ON BotW’s memories and chucked Zelda into the past just to get her out of the way.
Then, they had the brilliant idea to run the Dragon’s tears quest, the main quest, and the stables quests ALL AT THE SAME TIME. DESPITE THE FACT THAT ALL OF THEM SPOIL THE MAIN STORYLINE. And there was the storyline itself—I couldn’t give a flying flippity flapping flop about ANYONE in the past spare Zelda. THE SAGES AREN’T EVEN NAMED, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO SEE THEM AS ANYTHING BUT PLOT DEVICES? EVEN RARU WAS GIVEN MORE SCREEN TIME, HOLY SMOKES.
And the memories? Hot garbage. There are NO relationships to invest in. NO real mystery or questions the player will have. AND BARELY ANY OF IT IS RELEVANT TO WHAT’S HAPPENING IN THE GAME’S MODERN ERA BESIDES ZELDA BECOMING A WOR- er, dragon.
I could go on and on about how this game’s storytelling is just atrociously bad. I could make en entire flipping topic on the matter. I COULD WRITE A FANFIC ON I- oh hey, that’s a good idea.
the spirit of stocksounds is coming inside you 
guess the post: stocksounds or gamehero
its like “black metal lyric OR r/atheism post”
Oh come on, I’m not…
… Yeah, no, you’re right. I probably do need to chill.
Add a tulip stock market
Add real-world economics to the game. To compensate, all players who have more than 30k galleons get reset to 30k so they don’t immediately crash everything with inflation.
time to buy 14000 cargo before this gets added
You have to take a shower every in game day or your file gets deleted 
You need to get a brig as fast as possible unless you want the game to be unplayable
Add a shower to every town
You have 20 minutes to find someone with a brig (because I don’t think you are reaching level 100 and 20k galleons in that time)
you can steal other boats permanently, their original owner will need to purchase the boat again at full price UNLESS they’re signed up for Boat Insurance which only has a 40% chance of paying for it
and the insurance would only give 10-15% of the ship’s value