Syndicate - A Job Gone Wrong - Part One

After hours of procrastination, I have made this story.

A group of thieves were gathered around the table as Hunter laid out the blueprint of the building, “This will be our biggest job yet, some sort of alchemist’s workshop, they’ve got at least a hundred thousand galleons worth of explosives in there. I wish I didn’t have to say this, but please don’t drink anything”,

Arsiver replied jokingly “We’ll try to restrain ourselves.” As John inspected the blueprint he asked Hunter,

“So what’s the plan, it’s gotta be a high-security place if the job’s making half as much as you say?”,

“First I’ll boost you onto the balcony using my wind magic, then you guys, sneak in and John can lockpick the door, we’ll then grapple to the ceiling and get the heck out. Then we can head back and enjoy the money…. Any objections?”

“At least it doesn’t involve explosives like last time” replied John

“Hey Baron, I know your in the corner doing your shadow stuff, but did you at least hear half of it,” Arsiver says looking at Baron who was leaning on the dark corner.

“None at all” Replied Baron.

The thieves gathered on the rooftop adjacent to the workshop they planned to rob. “Well, there’s no guards as far as I can tell, You sure you didn’t get lost again?” John said while scoping out the building

“No, we’ve definitely got the right place”

“You sure this rich guy doesn’t, have like a… you know, bomb trap or something?” Arsiver replied

“A bomb trap would be far from practical, If it triggered it would kill you too,” said Baron, who looked a bit skeptical about the plan

“At least it can’t go as bad as last time we robbed a place like this” replied Hunter

“I would prefer we take a plan that does not involve being boosted at least 50 feet by unreliable magic” Baron responded

“Eh, well, you should’ve said something earlier”

Suddenly Hunter hit Baron in the back with a powerful wind spell, launching him across to the balcony hitting the wall, before bouncing down. Baron grumbled, before getting back up. John walked up to the ledge, and sighed, “Please don’t break anything important”, before being launched into the railing, where he lifted himself up, before collapsing on the balcony. “I think, I’ll pass, thanks,” Arsiver said before launching himself up with a pillar of earth, landing on, the roof and sliding down to the balcony, and falling 30 feet. Hunter launched himself onto the balcony and landed softly on the balcony. John gasped for breath and said to Hunter, ”Real soft landing you gave me there”

“Hey, it’s better than whatever the heck Arsiver did.”

The crew got up and began heading towards the storage room. Baron began to lockpick the door while the rest of the crew waited. As the door swung open, an alarm suddenly sounded. “That’s not good news,” Said John as he took out his blowdarts, “We’re here already and we’re getting at least a bags worth” Arsiver replied while filling up the bag with whatever potions he could find. The rest of the crew also began grabbing potions and contraptions off the wall and throwing it into the bag. They ran to the balcony with the full bag, to see at least a dozen squadrons of Grand Navy troopers outside, suddenly three guards dashed up the stairs, flintlocks in hand. John shot one with a blow dart, knocking him out, while Arsiver threw a rock at the remaining ones, knocking both of them down the stairs. “You guys did remember to bring the grappling hooks right!?” Hunter yelled while searching through his bag. “Probably, like 87% sure” Arsiver replied while searching his bag as well. Suddenly, out of nowhere a lieutenant came up the stairs and fired and hit the bag, causing it to catch fire. Arsiver panicked and launched the bag at the lieutenant, when it suddenly exploded, contraptions and explosives landed everywhere, exploding and destroying everything. It looked to have calmed down when a bomb started rolling towards the storage room door. “Uh oh”, said John, backing away. Hunter with a panicked expression on his face suddenly launched the crew into the ocean, when the building exploded into a ball of flame, decimating the Navy troops on the ground as shards of shrapnel and flames flew everywhere. Suddenly, they hit the water and it all went black.

Arsiver, slowly woke up in a jail cell, his vision blurry and his hands cuffed by a gauntlet-like object, the prevented him from moving his fingers. His legs were restrained by a similar object, suddenly a guard dragged him over to a room, where he was greeted by a stern-looking captain. “Your trial will begin soon.”

Arsiver scoffed and said, “Well it’s awfully civlized of you guys to fish me out of the water and immediately put me on trial with no time to prepare my defence, or meet up with the rest of the crew.”

The captain replied quickly, “The rest of your crew is dead, drowned without the durabilty of a magic user and as far as I can tell, you can’t defend yourself for the death of 24 troops you killed today” Arsiver looked down, feeling guilty for the death of his crew and the damage he had caused.

“Not so funny now, eh,” Said the captain as he walked out of the room, and slammed the door. A few minutes later, the guards walked into the room and dragged him over to a trials room, where he was greeted by the king and his 7advisors, as well as a crowd of audience members. “Arsiver Naron, You are accused of the accidental murder of 37 people and the endangerment of the whole city, How do you plead?” The king said from his throne. Arsiver sighed, before saying ”Guilty.” The audience talked among themselves, however, the bits he heard were far from positive. One of the advisors, who appeared to be older than the kingdom grumbled and spoke “Sentence him to death.”

Arsiver quickly protested “It was an accident! Do you think I intended to blow up a building and a whole lot of money up on purpose?”

“It doesn’t matter that it’s an accident!” shouted the aged advisor

The king looked at the advisor and said ”It was an accident, and you’re forgetting that I’m the one that makes the decisions here. It’s worth hearing alternative punishments”

The captain from earlier yelled out, “If we can’t kill him, then I’ll accept nothing short of life imprisonment!”

A rich-looking advisor replied “I would rather not have this young lad be forced to have his mind rot away in prison. I propose a different punishment, thirty years of indentured servitude to the Rivarn Merchant Guild. It certainly would help fund the kingdom and reform him. ”

The audience talked amongst themselves, while the king appeared to thinking about his options. The king looked up and came to a conclusion, “He will work as an indentured servant, but not for thirty years. It will be until he pays for the damages and funeral services caused by his actions.”

One person in the audience intrejected “Sir, that’s gotta be at least half a million galleons”

“Then it will be half a million he will pay. With hard work, he may redeem himself”

The audiences began arguing, either to increase or decrease his sentence, not a single person seems to be happy with the arrangement. The king shouted, ”ORDER, Whether you like it or not, that will be his sentence!” As the guards began to take off his cuffing, Arsiver saw the advisor that had saved him from a life sentence, “Thanks for the help. It might’ve not been favourable, but it’s better then life in a dingy prison” The advisor chuckled, “Oh it was no problem, No problem at all.”

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Feedback is greatly appreciated, first major non-school project so please don’t go too hard. Thanks for reading and sorry it didn’t go too far!

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Great story made me to remind vetex to add criminal trials into the game.

This is why punishment trials should be added in AO

@BNTarwarn do you have any suggestions for story? Your kinda the only really good writer I know

any specific parts you want feedback on? (or like, the parts you’re worried about in your writing?)

Just the thing in general, First real piece of writing and wanted to know if it sucked or not. I guess the planning scene is a bit bad in my opinion

I think it’s good you probably won’t reply to this though

no u

No u

Not that impactful, instead of throwing these three scenes together you should split them and try to be more thorough for each.

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So add more detail?

Basically, yeah.

Wait into differnt topics like release them sepreatly?

I suggest separating the three scenes (the planning, the operation, and the jailing/sentencing) and releasing them separately.

This signifies me to remind vetex to add courts and bloody execution in AO.

Yeah I lumped them toghether because I wanted to get to the actual plot by the second part. Will do smaller parts next time

wait a minute, you post during the day, meaning that your in the same timezone as me, but it’s 12 am in my timezone. Wait a minute

It’s 12 AM here too

yo midnight gaming